Gay dating after a period of being single isn’t easy
Some gay men seem to be constantly in and out of relationships, often taking little time in between the end of one and the beginning of the next. Others, however, go through long periods of being single for a variety of reasons. An example might be taking an extended break after splitting with a guy you very much loved.
Being single for a longer period of time can be very beneficial, as it allows you to put your energies into your own life and goals until you feel that the time is right for you to pursue a relationship again.
The downside, however, is that going months or years without dating can make the prospect of getting back into the dating scene intimidating. Here are five helpful tips for beginning to date again after a long period of being single for gay men.
1. Don’t Put Too Much Pressure on Yourself
The biggest reason that people who have been single for some months or years have difficulty getting back into dating is that they put far too much pressure on themselves beforehand.
If you start dating again, chances are you’ll have some awkward moments and some first dates that don’t produce second dates.
The key is not to spend too much time or energy worrying about these problems, as doing so will only make you more reluctant to keep trying. Instead, just have fun and see where things go.
2. Get Out and Meet People
One of the challenges of gay dating after having been single for a while is figuring out where to meet compatible people you might be interested in romantically.
Often, people struggling with this problem will turn to people they already know, hoping to find a relationship within their circle of friends or by being introduced to new people by friends.
This, however, makes many people uncomfortable because of the social pressure involved. A better approach is to go to new places and meet entirely new people.
Try to pick places or events that you are genuinely interested in, as they will tend to draw people with similar interests to yourself.
3. Don’t be Afraid to Make Friends
When trying to get back into dating, it’s almost inevitable that you will encounter people that share some of your interests and that you enjoy spending time with, but who aren’t what you’re looking for in a relationship partner.
This is why you should never be afraid to make new friends in the process of looking for dating prospects.
Even if a man you were initially interested in as someone who might like to have a relationship with turns out not to be the right person for you, you may still find yourself having gained a new friend.
4. Plan Dates That You Enjoy
When trying to make a good impression on someone else, it is easy to plan your dates with only that person in mind. Though it is a good idea to take the other person into consideration, it is also important to plan dates that both of you can enjoy.
Related: What to do when your date is a dud
By placing yourself in a situation where you can be comfortable and content, you will find yourself more able to focus on enjoying the company of the person you are on the date with.
5. Don’t Fear Rejection
The hardest part of being in the dating scene, whether you’ve been single for a while or not, is the fear of being rejected by someone you are interested in.
As unpleasant as it can be, rejection is simply a reality when you are looking for a new relationship.
Rather than worrying about it and letting it keep you away from dating, simply accept that it will happen, be gracious about it when it does and move past it.
By: Conrad Braxton