Santa had a makeover!
There’s a rumor going around that Santa Clause is so busy this year that he’s had to turn to some of his elves to help deliver gifts. And apparently, his pool of helpers are all hot! We’ve got it on good authority that several of these merry little gentleman are of the jock, wolf, bear and otter variety!
Just for fun, we’ve posted some pictures of these gift delivering helpers that will be circling the globe and sliding down chimneys to drop off wrapped and unwrapped goodies.
Oh, don’t worry – if you are without a chimney, we’re told these magical studs have the ability to slide through tight surfaces. That’s because all of them are equipped with silicone lube!
Also this year, Santa Clause himself has commanded that any gay man that is without a partner this holiday season is able to keep their elf for the day and do with him as they wish. This means you can take him out to parties, bring him with you to a family event or simply snuggle up on the couch.
Worried if your Santa is versatile? Don’t be! All of these elves have undergone intense training for the past year and are able to serve in whatever role you might need! And the best part is that when you are done with your Santa, he will simply leave. No small talk or awkward moments after spending time together. He’ll just put on his overalls and leave!
So as you look through each of the Santa’s listed below, think carefully about which one you want as your holiday visitor. When you’re done, click your heals together three times and say to yourself, I do believe in Christmas.
If you play your cards right, he’ll be sliding down your chimney tonight to stuff your stocking!