Learn when to bolt
I’m pretty sure that if you’re gay, you’ve probably experienced the following situation with a man at some point.
I’ll try to keep this as generic as possible. Here it goes:
You like a man. He really seems to dig you. The both of you decide to hang out. Everything seems perfect and you’re feeling like this could be “the one”. The same guy picks up on your vibe, starts to pull away and pretends like nothing ever happened.
Suddenly, you’ve been ghosted.
You end up feeling played while holding a bag of questions labeled, “WTF?” To cope, you tell yourself he’s got a serious mental health problem so that you don’t have accept the possibility that he just wasn’t into you.
Does this sound familiar?
Perhaps a slight exaggeration, but let’s be real – there are times in gay dating where it feels like the moment you let a guy in is the EXACT moment he pulls away.
During these difficult moments, it’s super easy to get frustrated and give in to an overpowering need to text the mother effer and remind him of what you two once had – and how stupid he is for leaving it all behind.
In the heat of the moment, it might make sense to do something like this. But whatever you do – please don’t. Trust me, seconds after you hit “send” on your device, you’re going to regret it big time.
Rather than get labeled as the “psycho-bitch” who can’t deal with being ghosted, why not be the strong gay man who walks first?
I’m here to tell you that it can be intensely discouraging (and humiliating) when I think about all of the hours I put into chasing after some asshole who wasn’t worth chasing after!
That time would have been much better spent hanging out with friends and/or watching a Chris Evans movie.
When you think about it, weren’t all of the red flags already there?
Weren’t those signs begging you to run, but you ignored them because you got caught up in wishful thinking? Didn’t you end up staying until the bitter end – until you were told or forced to leave?
Right now, make a commitment to yourself to stop repeating these mistakes. Stop holding on to men who were NEVER really there for you in the first place. Trust your inner voice. It’s almost always right.
Life is far too short and there are so many other guys out there who desperately want a relationship – perhaps with you.
Strong gay men don’t beg – ever. They leave the very moment they start feeling unwanted. If you are unsure exactly when that is, just look for these two behaviors:
1. He makes no effort to meet you
If another gay man wants to see you, he’ll make himself available. Once you recognize a pattern of excuses where he doesn’t follow through with agreed upon plans, dump his ass fast and move on!
Men aren’t that hard to read. If he seems majorly detached and uninterested in you, trust your feelings and bolt. Don’t get caught up in the game of “what ifs” or “maybe if I change [fill in the blank].” Just hit the warp drive honey and GTF out!
By: Rico Woods