Younger gay men should consider dating a daddy
I stumbled into a relationship with him by complete accident. What I thought would be a one night Grindr fling turned into something real. I was 23. He was 49.
Well over twice my age, and slightly younger than my parents. The sex is what brought me in (it was that good), but his personality, kindness, wisdom, and overall understanding of who he is a gay man, is what led me to stay.
I’ll be honest with you. I always thought the appeal of daddies was one thing: money.
Being freshly out of college, making a mere 32K a year working 60 hour weeks, with student loans flying out of my ass, the idea of having a sugar daddy was very enticing. Nevertheless, I never actively pursued a daddy.
But after stumbling into a relationship with a wealthier, older man, I can say there is so much more to daddies than their sugar. There’s so much we can learn about ourselves as younger gay/bi men.
It’s a rite of passage — something every gay twenty something has to do — date a daddy. Now when I say daddy, I’m not talking about a 32 year-old guy.
I’m talking a real daddy. I’m taking scruffy men in their 40’s, 50’s, and 60’s. Men the age of your parents. Real, full-fledged, beefy daddies.
In my less than humble opinion, you shouldn’t need any reasons to date a daddy, but in case you do, here are a solid eight.
1. They’ve made it through their twenties and thirties
You’ve probably realized it by now, but your twenties are a complete and utter clusterf*ck. You’ve graduated college, recently come out, and are figuring out what the hell you want to do with your life, as well as the type of person you want to become. Every gay man’s twenties is a hot mess. From what I’ve heard, your thirties are a little better.
There’s often a little bit more clarity, but not much. (I can’t attest to this being true or false… I’m 25.) Nevertheless, only once you’ve been out for a couple of decades, and are well into your 40’s, do you finally have a grip on your own life.
You’re finally aware of the person you are and the way you want to treat others. Daddies can help you find your identity, and help shape the person you want to become.
2. They’re beastly in the sack
Practice makes perfect. And the older you are, the more practice you’ve had. Daddies know what they’re doing in bed. They have it down. They can show you things you didn’t even know existed. Embrace it.
Let them run the show, while you have your mind (and other parts) blown.
3. They can offer a different gay perspective
They didn’t grow up with Grindr or Scruff. They didn’t grow up with marriage equality and words like “homonormativity.” They grew up during the AIDS epidemic.
They grew up in a time where it was much less acceptable to be gay. They can offer a very different perspective on gay life, and there’s so much you can learn from them.
4. They can give you career advice
By the time they’re 50, they’ve probably had more careers than you can name. They’re also probably pretty successful.
Given that you’re in your twenties, you’re probably not exactly sure what the hell you’re doing with your job, and what you want your so-called “career” to be. They can offer some solid and actionable career advice.
5. They can spoil you
I mean, they ARE daddies. Odds are, they have more money than you do, and sometimes more money than they know what to do with — given that they aren’t married and don’t have kids. Surely, they’re happy to spoil you a little bit.
They’ll help you indulge in some of the finer things of life.
6. They satisfy your daddy issues
Too real? These men can act as literal father figures, giving you the love, support, and affection that you never got from own father (perhaps because you weren’t “masculine” enough).
Is that the healthiest thing for you? Probably not. But hey, whatever works.
7. They drink nightly without being alcoholics
Older gays have drinking down. They don’t get blackout. They don’t puke. They’re not dependent on alcohol — using it as a crutch for social anxiety.
They don’t drink to forget or to fill an emptiness inside of them. They simply like drinking, and after decades of practice, know how to drink nightly without being an alcoholic. As a queer boy in his twenties, I can safely say I do NOT have drinking down like that.
8. They’re sexy AF
~Sploosh~ Daddies are sexy. There really isn’t that much more to say. They’re silver foxes. They have a confidence and classiness that only comes with age. They have hair in all the right places.
They are dangerously attractive. In case you didn’t know, there are different types of daddies, including muscle daddies and silver dads!
So it’s time, boys. Get on out there and meet the (older) man of your dreams. Find a daddy who can keep you warm at night. Find a daddy who can mentor you in all aspects of our life.
Find a daddy who can teach you a thing or two in the boudoir, and take you out to some fancy ass restaurants. Find a daddy to call your own.
By: Zachary Zane